Why I think love should be the end goal

The blink of an eye. A touch. Electricity running down my veins. You reach out and grab my hand from across the table. I lift my head and slowly blink my eyes open. Look into your eyes and lose myself in the depths within. It feels as if the entire world has come to a stop and there’s nothing but us, orbiting around each other. That was the moment I knew. I knew there was no going back. Whatever happened between us was irreversible and will forever stick. A touch that means so much more than any words ever could. A look from across the room that promises everything you ever dreamed of. A future covered in an unwritten book.

There’s no other topic my friends and I so heavily discuss as this one. Love, with a capital L. Because whereas there’s this widely spread argument that you do not have to be in a relationship to live a happy life – and don’t get me wrong, I absolutely agree on this – there also is nothing better than having someone root for you, while you stumble through this mess that is life.

I’m the last person to pursue a relationship simply for the sake of it. Nor will I ever force my friends into dates they do not want to go on because “they’re 25 now and abso – fucking – lutely HAVE to find a man. And dating can be fun too. Single life can be amazing. Nothing ever will compare to finding true love, though. Love is messy. It’s not always Instagram perfect and can end up leaving your heart-broken and shattered into a million pieces. When it comes down to it, though, I’d always give love a shot. 

And while pursuing a career is lovely, succeeding on your own feels fabulous and acing everything on your own is one of the best feelings in the world, I still am convinced that love should be the ultimate goal in life. For all of us. Be it only for a short amount of time. Finding someone you love makes everything about a million times better. The good, the bad and the ugly. I do not think relationships always have to be sleek and shiny. They can be short. Your love might be different, set across the globe, badly timed and found in the one you least expected it. It can be frustrating, daunting and utterly confusing.

Be it love for yourself, your partner, or a friend in need. Being a loving person most certainly should be our end goal.

I will forever remember that one conversation I had with a friend at 3 a.m. in the morning when I laid out my plans for the future. My drive, my passion, my ideas. And their answer was, “that’s great hun, but please be careful. You can earn all the money in the world but would you really fancy waking up in your London apartment with a million on your bank account, with no one by your side?”

My initial reaction was answering with a solid, “sure, what care do I have in the world if I am successful and rich, possibly with dozens of admirers only waiting for me to go out with them”. Meant jokingly of course – or not.

This remark has been haunting me for months now, though. Because they were right. Would I really rather succeed on my own and have all the money in the world or play in a team and have someone to root for me, if only from the benches, while trying to navigate through life themselves.

Truth is, you don’t have to necessarily live your life according to the standards that society sets. You might have multiple loves throughout your life. Or you might have one. It doesn’t matter who you’re with and how long it lasts.

It stills is the most beautiful motor to drive you forward, to keep you going and push you to your best. Love is the answer. It breaks boundaries, it lifts you up and pulls you back on the ground. But in the end, the most beautiful thing you can say about your life is that you were loved.

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  • Ich finde den Beitrag so wundervoll und wirklich wichtig.
    Und vor allem macht er mir so viel Mut.
    Als meine Beziehung letztes Jahr in die Brüche ging, hatte ich nur einen Gedanken: Das war’s jetzt. Du wirst für immer alleine sein.
    Aber das stimmt nicht. Ein halbes Jahr später bin ich zwar immer noch Single, aber ich weiß, dass es irgendwann wieder anders sein wird. :)
    Sehr schöner Post, liebe Kerstin.

    Wishes, Kat

  • Hey Kerstin,
    Hat mich voll gefreut, dass du das Thema ansprichst!
    Ich finde auch, dass zu zweit fast alles schöner ist. Dennoch genieße ich zurzeit das Single-Leben. Man lernt sich einfach selbst besser kennen – ist auch mal notwendig.
    Was ich wiederum wirklich schlimm finde ist, wenn jemand ganz verbissen “auf der Suche” ist und sich dann nur mit jemandem auf eine Beziehung einlässt, um nicht mehr single zu sein. Aber das ist wieder eine andere Geschichte. ;)

    Alles Liebe,

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